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    • 2021 News Articles >
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      • Will Tax Law Changes Increase Your Taxes?
      • Tax Watch: SECURE Act 2.0?
      • The unstoppable bull market?
      • Stocks Cruise at a High Altitude
      • Tax law changes on the horizon – 5 things to consider
      • Not Your Fathers Economic Recovery
      • Are HSAs the New IRAs?
      • REVENGE OF THE NERDS - Internet forums vs. the professionals
      • Protect Your Financial Information
      • 2021 January Market update - A rollercoaster year ends on a high note
      • Avoiding 7 Retirement Traps
    • 2020 News Articles >
      • December Client Letter - Cruising at 30,000 Feet
      • 9 Tax Facts & Tips to Save You Money
      • 9 Smart Planning Moves to Consider
      • November Client Letter - Election 2020
      • 7 Financial Planning Steps for Year End 2020
      • 6 Tips on Filing the FAFSA
      • Circling Back to the SECURE Act!
      • A September Pothole
      • 6 Steps That Put You on the Path to a Successful Retirement
      • Consumer Scams Part 2
      • September 2020 Client Letter
      • Consumer Scams
      • May Client Letter-- Worst-Ever Economy Yet Stocks Show Best Monthly Gain Since '87
      • Why Waiting For A Market Rebound Could Cost You
      • How The Greatest Generation Approached September 11th
      • Laid Off And Near Retirement - What Now?
      • The SECURE Act
      • Market update: When favorable fundamentals collide with uncertainty
    • News - Archives >
      • 2015 - To be happy, be grateful. - It's science!!
      • 2015 - Market Volatility - So Now What?
      • 2015 - Retirement planning: Start early or start late – just start
      • 2015 - Financial Planning Checklist
      • 2014 In Review - A bullish mood and risks that dot the landscape.
      • 2015 - A sneak peek at 2015 – What to keep an eye on
      • 2015 - Getting The Most Out of Financial Aid for College
      • 2014 - Cheaper by the Dozen: 12 smart year end planning moves
      • 2014 - How safe is your personal information?
      • 2014 - Hey, what’s your number?
      • 2014 - What did we do before GPS?
      • 2014 - Changing Jobs Checklist
      • 2013 - US Government Shutdown - What it means
      • 2013 - Investing in College
      • 2012 - Getting (back) on track - The best part of my job…
      • 2011 - The Henny Penny School of Investment Wisdom
      • 2011 - 8 Ways to Help Couples Overcome Money Conflicts
      • 2011 - Intelligent Computer Shopping
      • 2011 - 7 things you and your student should discuss before they head off to college
      • 2011 - 7 mistakes to avoid when exiting your business
      • 2011 - Why you need an Estate Plan even if you don’t live in a mansion
      • 2011 - Celebrating Irish Heritage
      • 2010 - Priorities: Retirement Planning Vs College Savings for Children
      • 2010 - in review, and a look toward 2011
      • 2010 - New Years Resolutions - 2011
      • 2010 - Business Owners – a special case for diversification
      • 2010 - Year End Planning 2010
      • 2010 - Paying for college - Applying for student aid, determining your Expected Family Contribution
      • 2010 - Paying Taxes
      • 2010 - Job-Loss
      • 2010 - Habits
      • 2009 - Shopping
      • 2009 - Gift-Idea
      • 2009 - Thanksgiving
      • 2009 - Q3
      • 2009 - Recovery
      • 2009 - Results
      • 2009 - Digging
      • 2009 - Time
      • 2009 - Considering
      • 2008 - Planning
      • 2008 - Resolutions
    • Life Transitions >
      • Get A Job/Leave Job >
        • 9 Questions to ask your CPA at tax time
        • Getting (back) on track - the best part of my job
        • Changing Jobs Checklist
        • Job Loss
        • Taxes - 7 ideas to ease the burden - 2018
        • Year End Planning Checklist: 12 smart planning moves to consider
      • Marriage/Divorce/Re-Married >
        • 8 Ways to Help Couples Overcome Cash Conflicts
      • Kids (Birth/College/Marriage) >
        • 7 Things you and your student should discuss before they head off the college
        • Getting The Most Out of Financial Aid For College
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        • Budgeting For Students
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        • Subsidized vs unsubsidized loans – what’s the difference?
        • 7 Tips for Your College Bound Student
        • “What I did on my Summer Vacation – 2019”
        • Budgeting for College Students - 2018
        • Most Significant FAFSA Changes in over 20 Years!!
        • Direct 529 Plan Changes To Be Implemented
      • Birth/Death >
        • Is a cash windfall in your future?
        • Planning for People with Special Needs
    • Client Letters >
      • 2019 - July Client Letter: Records Are Made To Be Broken
      • 2018 - Summer's Hot Issues
      • 2018 - November Market Update:
      • 2016 - January Client Letter - A volatile year ends with a whimper
      • 2016 - September Letter to Clients: The Ides of September?
      • 2016 - November Letter to Clients: The Final Countdown?
      • 2016 - December Letter to Clients: Near Term Impact of Trump's Victory
      • 2015 - September Client-letter: Looking past scary headlines
      • 2015 - November Client Letter: The Clouds Part
      • 2015 - December Client Letter, A Baker's Dozen: 13 Smart Planning Moves

8 Ways to Help Couples Overcome Money Conflicts

Later this week I am heading to California to attend my baby sister Ellen’s wedding.  –She is the youngest of 7 of us, and without giving away her age, she has been “out on her own” for over a decade, but yes, I still call her my BABY sister.  I am sure it will be all hearts and flowers for her and her new husband, at least until Monday rolls around and they get back to the rest of their lives together.  But let’s face it, any couple that has been together for any length of time -even in the strongest of marriages, will eventually have a disagreement about how to manage finances as a couple.  So here is my best advice for Ellen and Mark –and anyone else taking the plunge…

8 Secrets to Help Sweethearts Overcome Cash Conflicts
:

·          Communicate! Check whatever baggage you have at the door, and talk openly with your partner about the reasons behind your differences. Separate your “money selves” from your “sweetheart selves.” Remember that it was love — not money — that brought you together in the first place.  If you spouse makes a spending “mistake”, resist the urge to unload on them, but focus on how to best handle the setback together; –No secret credit cards or “offshore” accounts

·          Count it.  Track household income and expenses over the course of a month. Better yet, use a software program like Quicken or Money to manage/track all your finances.  Develop a budget and track your spending against it so if you over-spend, you know how to reel it in.  Also, decide together how both of you will contribute to household expenses. Even if one person is the primary bill payer, the other spouse needs to have an idea of what's going on

·          Build an emergency fund. It is a good idea to create an emergency fund that equals three to six months of living expenses.  If you are able, put part of that money in a Roth Individual Retirement Account (IRA).  It will save on taxes and any money contributed can be taken out at any time without a penalty

·          Find common ground. Instead of dwelling on your differences over money, identify the expectations and aspirations — buying a vacation home, sending a child to college, etc. — you share with your spouse. Let those goals guide your financial decisions and behavior.  You have to have all the same goals but it's important to get buy in from each other on your hopes and dreams and have a shared vision of what’s

·          Save for your home. Begin saving for a 20 percent down payment on a home, and don't get overextended.  As a rule of thumb, the home to be purchased should not be worth more than two to two and one-half times annual combined income.  I also warn clients about the variable rate trap that stung so many people in recent years.  If you plan on spending a lifetime in the house, don’t sign up for a mortgage that will adjust in 5 or 7.  If you can’t afford the payments at a typically higher 15 or 30 year rate, think about a smaller house. 

·          Save for your retirement. Save 10 percent of annual income, which includes contributing to retirement plans. They offer tax savings and, if your employer matches the savings, faster growth. 

·          It is OK to agree to disagree. On certain points, some couples may never agree. What’s important is settling on a money management approach that accommodates the saver’s priorities as well as the spender’s. One approach that some financial planners recommend is to give each spouse a budgeted allotment and the discretion to spend it or save it, as they see fit.

·          Enlist an professional. You and your loved one’s finances are very important, and you should trust them only to an experienced and trusted financial planner. No one is better qualified to help couples work through money issues, set goals and put a plan in place for attaining them.  –If your older brother is not a Certified Financial Planner®, you can contact me, or find one in your area by going to http://www.napfa.org/index.asp

John A. Davidson, CPA, CFP®

john@kyleshill.com

John Davidson is a Certified Financial Planner®, and owner of KylesHill Group in Columbus Ohio, providing Comprehensive, Fee-only personal financial planning to business owners, individuals and couples. 

Your comments and questions are always welcome.
We look forward to hearing from you.  mail@kyleshill.com


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- John Davidson, CFP
  • Home
  • Background
    • About Us
    • Q&A
    • Disclosures
    • Privacy Policy
  • Services
    • Planning Process
  • Clients
    • Business Owners
    • Individual Professionals, Families, Retirees
  • Contact Us
    • Newsletter Sign-Up
    • Useful Websites & Quick Hits
  • Account Access
  • News
    • 2021 News Articles >
      • What is it about September?
      • Will Tax Law Changes Increase Your Taxes?
      • Tax Watch: SECURE Act 2.0?
      • The unstoppable bull market?
      • Stocks Cruise at a High Altitude
      • Tax law changes on the horizon – 5 things to consider
      • Not Your Fathers Economic Recovery
      • Are HSAs the New IRAs?
      • REVENGE OF THE NERDS - Internet forums vs. the professionals
      • Protect Your Financial Information
      • 2021 January Market update - A rollercoaster year ends on a high note
      • Avoiding 7 Retirement Traps
    • 2020 News Articles >
      • December Client Letter - Cruising at 30,000 Feet
      • 9 Tax Facts & Tips to Save You Money
      • 9 Smart Planning Moves to Consider
      • November Client Letter - Election 2020
      • 7 Financial Planning Steps for Year End 2020
      • 6 Tips on Filing the FAFSA
      • Circling Back to the SECURE Act!
      • A September Pothole
      • 6 Steps That Put You on the Path to a Successful Retirement
      • Consumer Scams Part 2
      • September 2020 Client Letter
      • Consumer Scams
      • May Client Letter-- Worst-Ever Economy Yet Stocks Show Best Monthly Gain Since '87
      • Why Waiting For A Market Rebound Could Cost You
      • How The Greatest Generation Approached September 11th
      • Laid Off And Near Retirement - What Now?
      • The SECURE Act
      • Market update: When favorable fundamentals collide with uncertainty
    • News - Archives >
      • 2015 - To be happy, be grateful. - It's science!!
      • 2015 - Market Volatility - So Now What?
      • 2015 - Retirement planning: Start early or start late – just start
      • 2015 - Financial Planning Checklist
      • 2014 In Review - A bullish mood and risks that dot the landscape.
      • 2015 - A sneak peek at 2015 – What to keep an eye on
      • 2015 - Getting The Most Out of Financial Aid for College
      • 2014 - Cheaper by the Dozen: 12 smart year end planning moves
      • 2014 - How safe is your personal information?
      • 2014 - Hey, what’s your number?
      • 2014 - What did we do before GPS?
      • 2014 - Changing Jobs Checklist
      • 2013 - US Government Shutdown - What it means
      • 2013 - Investing in College
      • 2012 - Getting (back) on track - The best part of my job…
      • 2011 - The Henny Penny School of Investment Wisdom
      • 2011 - 8 Ways to Help Couples Overcome Money Conflicts
      • 2011 - Intelligent Computer Shopping
      • 2011 - 7 things you and your student should discuss before they head off to college
      • 2011 - 7 mistakes to avoid when exiting your business
      • 2011 - Why you need an Estate Plan even if you don’t live in a mansion
      • 2011 - Celebrating Irish Heritage
      • 2010 - Priorities: Retirement Planning Vs College Savings for Children
      • 2010 - in review, and a look toward 2011
      • 2010 - New Years Resolutions - 2011
      • 2010 - Business Owners – a special case for diversification
      • 2010 - Year End Planning 2010
      • 2010 - Paying for college - Applying for student aid, determining your Expected Family Contribution
      • 2010 - Paying Taxes
      • 2010 - Job-Loss
      • 2010 - Habits
      • 2009 - Shopping
      • 2009 - Gift-Idea
      • 2009 - Thanksgiving
      • 2009 - Q3
      • 2009 - Recovery
      • 2009 - Results
      • 2009 - Digging
      • 2009 - Time
      • 2009 - Considering
      • 2008 - Planning
      • 2008 - Resolutions
    • Life Transitions >
      • Get A Job/Leave Job >
        • 9 Questions to ask your CPA at tax time
        • Getting (back) on track - the best part of my job
        • Changing Jobs Checklist
        • Job Loss
        • Taxes - 7 ideas to ease the burden - 2018
        • Year End Planning Checklist: 12 smart planning moves to consider
      • Marriage/Divorce/Re-Married >
        • 8 Ways to Help Couples Overcome Cash Conflicts
      • Kids (Birth/College/Marriage) >
        • 7 Things you and your student should discuss before they head off the college
        • Getting The Most Out of Financial Aid For College
        • Investing In College
        • Budgeting For Students
        • Save on Textbooks
        • Subsidized vs unsubsidized loans – what’s the difference?
        • 7 Tips for Your College Bound Student
        • “What I did on my Summer Vacation – 2019”
        • Budgeting for College Students - 2018
        • Most Significant FAFSA Changes in over 20 Years!!
        • Direct 529 Plan Changes To Be Implemented
      • Birth/Death >
        • Is a cash windfall in your future?
        • Planning for People with Special Needs
    • Client Letters >
      • 2019 - July Client Letter: Records Are Made To Be Broken
      • 2018 - Summer's Hot Issues
      • 2018 - November Market Update:
      • 2016 - January Client Letter - A volatile year ends with a whimper
      • 2016 - September Letter to Clients: The Ides of September?
      • 2016 - November Letter to Clients: The Final Countdown?
      • 2016 - December Letter to Clients: Near Term Impact of Trump's Victory
      • 2015 - September Client-letter: Looking past scary headlines
      • 2015 - November Client Letter: The Clouds Part
      • 2015 - December Client Letter, A Baker's Dozen: 13 Smart Planning Moves